The Gardens - In the Beginning

Saturday, March 5, 2011

A Bit of Nonsense

Running out of time - how is it possible to run out of what is and always will be?  Running out of my slot of time, I so foolishly allocated too little of for the creation of a blog post this week.  (Okay alright already......that I so foolishly non-allocated...zilch kaput nada nada nada...for the creation of something wondrous to pop out of my head this week.)  Bits, pieces, chunks and clunks of time are attached to oodles and oodles of my daily paraphernalia; and the end of every day accumulates into a gigantic human struggle to jiggle, jaggle, juggle unconsummated plans into fulfillment before the magical stroke of midnight when time begins to repeat itself.  Calendars, watches, clocks, date books, etc., etc., etc.; stuff needed so we can effectively drive ourselves loony bin loonaciously crazy obsessing over time and lack of time in each group of repeated hours...I'm trying to chuck these obstacles of happiness into oblivion.  Lost you yet??? :)  I try not to, but am quite an effective executioner of double digit lists of multi-tasking mania to be completed before that strike of twelve...way past beddie bye time.  Failure not an option, more times than once, midnight has been fudged to one or two o'clock in the morning.  Please someone throw me a life line, and extract me out of this black hole of obsessive mismanagement of my ALL time, so I actually have a bit of ME time.  This piece of nonsensical gibberish would make even Dr. Seuss proud beyond measurement 100%.

A little ditty to waste a bit of your time on how I wasted my bit of time big time, right up there on the scale of "what a dork" dorkiness.  I try to live in denial of events that shine a spotlight on my slight inability to remember some things well, but I have some kind of pernicious need tonight to embarrass the bejeebies out of myself for your reading pleasure.  Living in total denial of this tale, telling you the correct year of occurrence is not an option, although me thinks it was sometime this decade.  As the official water topper offer of the work place slightly done poorly void of life pond, it was my duty to add water to the park pond when it was beginning to resemble the mud pit of a pig farm.  A filling pond never fills up when watched closely; therefore, I always multi-tasked, checking on the pond every half hour or so.  My work day had gone, just gone; my evening had gone well, very well; I was brushing my teeth around elevenish in preparation for sleepy bye time; when a bolt of blinding light sizzled my brain and swooshed the breath right out of my being...I had forgotten to turn off the faucet attached to the pipe, that the water hose was screwed onto...that hose that was filling the pond with water for the last eight hours.  Telephoning the resident ranger at that time of night to correct my blunder would have been suicide.  Waiting another nine hours for my arrival to work would have been double suicide if the park manager arrived before me.  Oooooh...yuck! Yuck!! YUCK!!!  Husband snoring, thank goodness - as it covered up the tip toeing around to get dressed and sneaking out of the house.

A 40 mile trip arriving one o'clock in the morning with a herd of deer watching me in the dark as I flipped off that dern dang nabbitt crap ass water faucet, and marveled at how much territory was watered that night.  Highway patrol cars look like...well just like cars in pitch black darkness, making speeding a non-option; and the drive back home seem like an eternity.  I was dreading the thought of husband waiting in chair, arms crossed, scowl on face; or even worse that he had telephoned the police to report my kidnapping...but I carefully slowly opened that front door to the sweet music of adorable snoring, and let out a long sigh of relief...mission accomplished...blunder covered one the wiser - wheeeeew! Now to get my three hours sleep before the alarm goes off for another fun filled day.  The measures one will take to always appear like perfection most secret...and now you have it...the whole story.  As for comments, I'm over the hill and gaining speed, what did you kind.


  1. Oh my! Does it feel good to get that off your chest? From one obsessive mismanager of time to another - here's hoping you find a bit for yourself.

  2. When I do these 'tongue in cheek' posts about myself, I always wonder if my readers will thing I'm a bit weird. I used to be lists obsessed, but am trying to get away from that now. I always try to work myself to death, if given half a chance, so I'm giving myself permission now to just be a little more sloppy and relax a bit.

  3. I never get everything done either. Sometimes I realize I still have to do dishes at 1 in the morning. :(

  4. my days are filled with haphazard, spastic bouts of busyness versus laziness. i could totally see myself doing exactly what you did with that damn water hose. and i'd be the one to drive in the night to check too, only to find that it wasn't still running & i'd wasted that time & loss of sleep.
    don't feel bad, we don't think you're weird. you just have a busy brain that can't keep up with everything all the time. like us!

  5. "Multi-tasking" what are you ladies talking about?

    (Ha! the verfication word was "prehaha" ...that is pretty funny)

  6. Fabulous! EXACTLY what I would have done. And you saved yourself some embarrassment.

    Loved your story, had a good smile too! Now take some time for yourself. :-))

  7. ACK!!! I spelled a word wrong in my comment. That will drive me daffy for a day or two. Thank you all for leaving such wonderful comments for me to read. I'm so lucky to have you all in my blogging family.

  8. I would have done the exact same thing. Never would I admit to anyone what I did and waiting until morning wasn't an option. So, bravo!
    I also loved how you used the word 'pernicious' in a sentence. Not completely uncommon, but it's a word that should be used more often.

  9. I'm exhausted just reading it! LOL
    and I LOVE the pictures of your gorgeous pets, they're are absolutely wonderful :o)

  10. Al - I so wanted to stay mum and take all the glory; BUT, I have to give all the credit to spell check for using 'pernicious' in my post. I was relying on spell check to clue me in to a word's spelling; spell check hadn't a clue what the heck I was talking about, and 'pernicious' was one of the offerings it spit out. Sorry...but I had to use the dictionary for it's true meaning so I wouldn't appear an idiot, as the word sounded so neat and I found it's perfect place in my post.

    Deborah - thank you for stopping by. Your Grace is such a cute dog, and Cracker sounds like a wonderful cat. I haven't found where you have a photo of her yet.

  11. This post made me laugh, but I was waiting for the bit at the end where it turned out that you had unconsciously already turned off the water faucet. I can't tell you how many times I have driven off wondering if I have shut the garage door, only to drive around the block, back home to find out I had.

    Pernicious? Let me go look that up.

  12. Al - You little made me open up my dictionary again, lol.

    Shelly - If I had arrived at that pond only to find the water was already shut off, I'm afraid you would have heard my scream all the way to Australia, lol.

  13. Mannnnnn, think I messed up...
    you might get this twice....Oh well....

    Anyway, I popped by to ask you to stop by my post tomorrow and pick up the award that I am passing on to you (post #153).

    You don't have to accept it (or follow any rules)...I just wanted you to know that I appreciate your blog. kt

  14. Very enlightening and beneficial to someone whose been out of the circuit for a long time.

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