I think I have cried so much; my soul is
dead. I feel nothing but emptiness.
Lacey died yesterday evening from cardiac
arrest; her little body was so thin, she had no more to give, and let go of
life. I wasn’t there when she breathed her
last breath, which I find unbearable to live with at the moment. I would have wished for her to feel my touch
and kiss before she passed.
I am angry that my veterinarian kept
telling me it would take time for the medication to work while she basically
starved to death. I am disappointed in
myself that I didn’t pursue a second opinion sooner, especially when the
emergency veterinarian told me there were more options if time had been on her
side.
It is a mess in my head right now.
She was my calm when she laid on my lap to be
stroked across her cheek and the back of her neck; then when I spoke, turning her head towards me with those soulful
eyes gazing into mine with such sublime ecstasy. As I quietly sat listening to
her low soothing purr, she never failed to turn her gaze once again in my
direction followed by a hoarse little murmur of a meow when I spoke to her. She was so lovely
that way, talking to me.
.jpg)
Sweet Dreams, my sweetheart.
I love you so much.
.jpg)
%20-%20Copy.jpg)
Ooh, so sorry to learn this Yvonne, it is such a heartbreaking experience to say goodbye. Godspeed over that Rainbow Bridge sweet Lacey, now free from pain.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
~Jo
xx
Oooh, oooh! I cry with you, Yvonne, for sweet Lacey... I know how much the soul hurts, I know how many thoughts and questions and guilt run in our heads at such moments. I went through such moments (the last time in January 2019); I am not writing as a consolation, but to let you know that I understand what it means to lose such a soul... It's heartbreaking. It is heartbreaking because we have absolutely nothing to reproach these sweet beings, they have never done us any harm on purpose, they have never said bad words to us, we have never argued with them (oh, maybe sometimes we argued, but not seriously and we didn't hold grudges)...
ReplyDeleteI hug you with love! I don't know what else I could write... I am so very sorry.
...I'm sorry to hear about Lacey. Years ago we were taking our car, patches to the vet and she died in my arms before we got there.
ReplyDeleteThis is the hardest thing in life. I don't know why but it is. Please don't beat yourself up. You have a lot of love to give, I can tell. Please don't be afraid to love again when the time is right. Share the gift of you with another deserving animal and you will both be blessed. When you are ready. My heart goes out to you. With tears and fondly
ReplyDeleteMy dear Yvonne, I came as soon as I read your comment, tears in eyes at your loss of Lacey. I know just how painful this is, as I too have loved and lost cherished four-legged members of my family. I grieve with you, and at this time there is nothing more I can say or do to help relieve your sadness. Sending you loving hugs, and all my sympathy.
ReplyDeleteHello Yvonne,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear Lacey has passed on. It is hard any time loosing a family pet, they are loved so much. RIP Lacey!
I am so sorry for your loss. Forgive yourself. Lacey understands you did the best you could.
ReplyDeleteOh ~ dear ~ sending lots of healing energy hugs ~ Lacey was a beautiful kitty and much loved ~ I am not sure what is happening in this country but the quality and competencies seemed to have deteriorated dramatically ~ It is hard to know who to trust ~ but know that there is an invisible connection to Lacey and there is a sweet book entitled ~ The Invisible Leash by Patrice Karst and illlustrated by Joanne Lew-Vriethoff ~ it helped me when I lost my doggie in July ~ July 1st to be exact ~ Also, the day Lacey died is the day I got my new doggie ~ a woman who because of poor health could no logger care for Ziggie ~ a male Maltese/Shih Tzu and so I was blessed with him ~ he is sweet and adjusting well and I am grateful ~ So I thank Lacey and you ~ and send you lots of healing energy hugs ~ Carol
ReplyDeleteOh Yvonne, I'm soooo sorry! I can understand you and also your thoughts, your anger (at the vet and also at yourself)... but at the same time I am convinced that Lacey always felt how much you loved her. Animals don't know how old they are, they just sense if they have a good loving home or not - and I AM ABSOLUTELY SURE Lacey knew her home was good and loving.
ReplyDeleteI hug you very tightly,
much love, Traude
https://rostrose.blogspot.com/2022/09/juli-august-2022-teil-2-und-weiter- geht.html
Heartfelt condolences to you. Take care and treasure the moments you've had with Lacey.
ReplyDeleteOh Yvonne, reading this just breaks my heart. The loss of any pet that is dearly loved is shattering but I know it must be all the more so when you weren't able to be with her. But I also suspect that Lacey knows you are and always have been always with her. I hope you will let that ease in time. I send all love and wishes for peace and healing.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss. The words in such moments are not enough.
ReplyDeleteI just hope that in time the sadness will diminish.
Just good thoughts and love toward you.
I feel pain for your great loss; it's heart breaking. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry you lost your precious Lacey. I know she felt loved right up until the end. Please try to be consoled by that. Sweet hugs my friend, Diane
ReplyDeleteHello Yvonne, What a beautiful post and tribute to Lacey. I felt the love in your words and I send a prayer of strength to you getting through this tough time. Thank you for a touching post and for your kind comment on my blog. Best wishes and blessings to you! John
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for your loss. Lacey knows you love her. Sending my hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteI don't know you and don't know how I ended up here but your kitty looks just like my Misty and I took her to the vet because she was spitting her food up for two or three days. She had a tumor that was blocking her esophagus and there was really no fix. We had to put her down on the spot. It was SO unexpected that it haunted me for years that I lost her. I truly understand your pain. My heart goes out to you. Diana
ReplyDeleteOh that's so sad.
ReplyDelete