What if…
What if I
had played it safer, would I have been all I could be? What if I had played it chancier, would I have
been all I could be?
What if I
had learned to make decisions earlier in life, if I had made better choices in
the beginning…would I be happier?
What if
when I lost I hadn’t lost the lesson so much?
What if
when I look back I could actually enjoy it a second time around?
What if I could
just look forward instead of always glancing backwards…what if, what if, what
if…?
I worry if
I look back one more time at the complications that follow me, at least in my
head, I’ll turn to a pillar of salt. My
head spins forwards and backwards a lot these days. Maybe I should watch The Exorcist and take a
few pointers, or wait…did that really have any kind of good ending?
You're a very good writer... this piece had me mesmerized from the first two words... what if... I think we can drive ourselves crazy pondering that question. I'm so sorry for your recent loss, and all those what ifs are not really that crucial, because the love amongst family is always there, no matter what or what if.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear of your loss. You are such a caring person. Since we can't change the past, perhaps it's best to focus on today and hope for the future.I know it's hard! Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteI think most of us can say the "what ifs," Yvonne. I can only hope that if we get to the place of looking back, we can make some changes going forward, learning from our mistakes? I too am sorry for the loss of your brother. Please accept my deepest sympathies and condolences.
ReplyDeleteP. S. Is that your drawing? It is fabulous!
ReplyDelete